The Great Affirmation Quiz

Just say no to affirmations

The Internet seems to be surfing on an endless wave of affirmations. It’s as if everyone on the web is eager to tell everyone else how to achieve happiness, which, presumably, is a lot easier than finding it for themselves.

These uplifting sentiments are almost always retreads, snatched from questionable sources and presented so that others may pass them along yet again. But what’s so bad about affirmations? Well, passionately believing insane nonsense isn’t good for one’s mental health. When it comes time to separate gold from dross, unsentimental scrutiny and sound analysis are essential.

It is useful to consider the source; is the mind that spun this confection rational, reputable, and reliable? To help you sharpen your skills I’ve assembled 20 of the most compelling affirmations I could find on the Internet. For each I’ve listed 4 possible authors. Correct answers will be posted in tomorrow’s blog – good luck!

Who Really Originated These Popular Affirmations?

1. “Never underestimate your ability to underestimate others and overestimate your own capabilities.”
a.) Michele Bachmann
b.) Marcel Proust
c.) Lizzie Borden
d.) Taz Mopula

2. “Live as if you’ll be forgotten only for your deeds, not for your words.”
a.) Nikola Tesla
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Uri Geller
d.) George Ruth

3. “People are imperfect by nature; if a person you know and love doesn’t disappoint you, you have a right to feel let down.”
a.) Ayn Rand
b.) L. Ron Hubbard
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) Martha Stewart

4. “Being average is a very special gift; find awesome in mediocrity. Do not let anyone talk you out of your right to be ordinary.”
a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Pema Chödrön
c.) Ivan Pavlov
d.) Oprah Winfrey

5. “All emotional torment arises from the inability to extinguish hope.”
a.) Carl Jung
b.) Mary Shelley
c.) Blind Lemon Jefferson
d.) Taz Mopula

6. “Before you criticize a man, walk half a mile in his shoes, turn around, retrace your steps, and return them to him.”
a.) Mikhail Baryshnikov
b.) Cab Calloway
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) Lance Armstrong

7. “Not all human sacrifice is equally noble; it depends a little on which human is being sacrificed.”
a.) Donald Trump
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Phil Spector
d.) Duane Chapman

8. “For the first time in history mankind has the technological ability to eliminate all human life; so what’s the hold up?”
a.) Richard Gatling
b.) Ferdinand von Zeppelin
c.) Wernher von Braun
d.) Taz Mopula

9. “You can’t fool all of the people all of the time; but why would you even try when they’re so eager to do the job for you?”
a.) Stacy London
b.) Dane Cook
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) Jim Jarmusch

10. “Expect people to disappoint you. Then, when they don’t, you’ll really have something to be disappointed about.”
a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Marilyn Monroe
c.) Wayne Dyer
d.) Andy Kaufman

11. “If you need both hands and both feet to count your dearest friends; don’t do it while you’re driving.”
a.) J.D. Salinger
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Tomás de Torquemada
d.) Dale Earnhardt

12. “Thinking you are better than other people simply because you are smarter than they are is proof that you aren’t.”
a.) Neil deGrasse Tyson
b.) Ann Coulter
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) Christopher Hitchens

13. “The world is most certainly not a fair place, which, for the vast majority of us, is very fortunate indeed.”
a.) Ed Gein
b.) Barbra Streisand
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) David Berkowitz

14. “In the final analysis it’s important to remember that uniqueness is about the only thing we all have in common.”
a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Idi Amin
c.) Che Guevara
d.) Kim Kardashian

15. “Everything happens for a reason; frequently it’s a very bad reason.”
a.) Isaac Newton
b.) Deepak Chopra
c.) Anna Nicole Smith
d.) Taz Mopula

16. “Independence is theoretically possible, provided you’ve got sufficient support.”
a.) Dalai Lama
b.) Tony Robbins
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) Ethelred the Unready

17. “Uncertainty is all we can rely on.”
a.) Søren Kierkegaard
b.) Marcel Duchamp
c.) Ambrose Bierce
d.) Taz Mopula

18. “There is nothing to fear except you itself.”
a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Virginia Woolf
c.) Nathaniel West
d.) Dorothy Parker

19. “If you want to find your bliss, get yourself some blisters.”
a.) Mark Twain
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Junior Walker
d.) Johnny Walker

20. “Think twice before burning bridges; you never know when you might want to jump off one of them.”
a.) Hannibal
b.) Spalding Gray
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) H. L. Mencken

See tomorrow’s blog for correct answers.

Published by

Alistair McHarg

Alistair McHarg was born in Cambridge, Massachusetts, moved immediately to Edinburgh, and three years later moved to Amsterdam. At 6 he settled in Philadelphia and for 16 years was confused by Quaker education; Germanton Friends School and Haverford College. A Master of Arts in Creative Writing from the University of Louisville nudged him even closer to unemployability.

Convinced at an early age that fate had chosen writing as his calling, Alistair followed a characteristically slow and circuitous path. He has found work as deck hand on a Norwegian tramp freighter touring South America, Bureau of Land Management Emergency Fire Fighter in Alaska, guide at a Canadian wilderness survival camp, truck driver crisscrossing Colorado’s continental divide, and inner city cabbie.

Alistair has been arranging words on paper for a living since 1983.