The Internet Thought Leader Quote Quiz

No Dying Man Ever Wished He Had Invested More Time

Internet Thought Leader Quote Quiz

The intrepid Internet surfer eventually discovers that – packed in between wise cracking cats and vapid affirmations – some highly intelligent social commentary awaits. But how familiar are you with the Internet’s most influential thought leaders? Below are 20 carefully selected nuggets, with multiple possible authors. Can you source them accurately?

1. “With all the expertise being volunteered on the Internet, ignorance is rapidly becoming a priceless commodity.”

a.) Mark Zuckerberg
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Larry Page
d.) Jack Dorsey

2. “I avoid all political discussions because the doctor told me to reduce my daily intake of anger and stupidity.”

a.) Karl Rove
b.) Michele Bachmann
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) Glenn Beck

3. “Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me every day and you’re ready to run for office.”

a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Sarah Palin
c.) Reverend Al Sharpton
d.) Jeffrey Dahmer

4. “New app enables users to bravely condemn global injustice and insult authority figures without budging from comfy recliner!”

a.) Anonymous
b.) Abbie Hoffman
c.) Nelson Mandela
d.) Taz Mopula

5. “There are no guarantees in life, not even death and taxes, especially if you’re a corporation.”

a.) Paul Volcker
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Alan Greenspan
d.) John Wayne Gacy

6. “American liberals, celebrated for their tolerance, stalwartly defend the right of wretched refuse to agree with them.”

a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Noam Chomsky
c.) Maya Angelou
d.) Idi Amin Dada

7. “Democracy guarantees the right to choose the wrong person.”

a.) Ronald Reagan
b.) Vlad the Impaler
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) George W. Bush

8. “Political Correctness: An experiment in social engineering which holds that renaming dung mousse au chocolat makes it edible.”

a.) Oprah Winfrey
b.) Ellen DeGeneres
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) David Berkowitz

9. “The problem with Democracy is that it allows absolutely everybody to participate; fortunately they don’t.”

a.) Will Rogers
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) H. L. Mencken
d.) Mark Twain

10. “Often it is through the process of explaining a concept to others that we come to fully appreciate the depth of our ignorance.”

a.) Rush Limbaugh
b.) Ann Coulter
c.) Pol Pot
d.) Taz Mopula

11. “Learning how to ask for help is essential; but beware of zealots, all zealots, they will help you to death.”

a.) Moammar Khadafi
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Rumi
d.) Yanni

12. “Think about it. If I knew of a way to make loads of money without working hard, would I share it with you?”

a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Tony Robbins
c.) Wayne Dwyer
d.) Pema Chödrön

13. “Those who would do the right thing because it is, conveniently, also the expedient thing, are already morally bankrupt.”

a.) Jesse Jackson
b.) Janet Jackson
c.) Andrew Jackson
d.) Taz Mopula

14. “There is only one truly effective way to defend yourself against terrorists; stop creating them.”

a.) Dick Cheney
b.) Robert McNamara
c.) Barbra Streisand
d.) Taz Mopula

15. “War is extremely useful for those eager to disprove evolution.”

a.) Charles Darwin
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Gregor Mendel
d.) Antonie van Leeuwenhoek

16. “Having a poo-flinging monkey on your back may be tiresome, but it’s far worse for your adversaries.”

a.) Duane Chapman
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Dian Fossey
d.) Steve Irwin

17. “History repeats itself with tedious insistence; mankind seems determined to perfect its imperfections.”

a.) Nostradamus
b.) John Edward
c.) Christopher Hitchens
d.) Taz Mopula

18. “If your efforts have assuaged the suffering of just one road-weary, hopeless soul; you probably aren’t trying very hard.”

a.) Dalai Lama
b.) Charles Manson
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) Arsenio Hall

19. “WWIII is over; don’t you remember? It was US against US; and we lost.”

a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Ludacris
c.) Gil Scott Heron
d.) Fatty Fat Boy

20. “Should you meet someone who claims that visualizing a thing makes it so; tell them to visualize being flattened by a bus.”

a.) Wayne Dyer
b.) Joseph Campbell
c.) Glen Campbell
d.) Taz Mopula

Answers will be posted in tomorrow’s blog.

The Great Internet Quote Quiz

With All The Expertise Volunteered Internet Ignorance Priceless

As we surf the net in search of self-improvement tools, tips, and techniques it behooves us to consider the source of every thought nugget we devour. Do not feed your mind with tainted thoughts from questionable vendors. Before embracing an idea, verify the authenticity of its source. This quiz will help sharpen your skills! Identify the actual source of each quote.

1. “Just say no to nihilism.”
a.) Tristan Tzara
b.) Leo Buscaglia
c.) Ellen DeGeneres
d.) Taz Mopula

2. “Visualize world illiteracy.”
a.) Oprah Winfrey
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Mark Twain
d.) Steven Jobs

3. “Think globally, act sillilly.”
a.) Julian Assange
b.) Paris Hilton
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) J.K. Rowling

4. “Life is good, death is poopy.”
a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Wayne Dyer
c.) Pat Robertson
d.) Adam Savage

5. “Humility is nothing to brag about.”
a.) Kanye West
b.) Tony Robbins
c.) Mark Chapman
d.) Taz Mopula

6. “Beware of petting a peeve; they bite.”
a.) Kim Kardashian
b.) Oscar Wilde
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) Penn Jillette

7. “Depression is nothing to laugh about.”
a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Phil Specter
c.) Homer
d.) Ivan The Terrible

8. “Reality is not merely a lifestyle option.”
a.) Ronald Reagan
b.) Paulo Coelho
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) Charles Manson

9. “Write first, decide not to later, edit later still.”
a.) Geraldo Rivera
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Bob Dylan
d.) David Berkowitz

10. “Exorcise your demons, don’t exercise them.”
a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Tomás de Torquemada
c.) George W. Bush
d.) Maya Angelou

11. “Be nice to your enemies; you just might be one of them.”
a.) Rasputin
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Whitey Bulger
d.) George Martin

12. “Expect the worst and you’re unlikely to be disappointed.”
a.) John Wayne Gacy
b.) Liberace
c.) Leonard Cohen
d.) Taz Mopula

13. “If you want to find your bliss, get yourself some blisters.”
a.) Pema Chödrön
b.) E. L. James
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) Jerry Garcia

14. “Beware of the future, it’s a fun place to visit but bad place to live.”
a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Albert Einstein
c.) Nostradamus
d.) Ernest Hemingway

15. “Think twice before burning bridges; you never know when you might want to jump off one of them.”
a.) Paul Reubens
b.) Greuthungi the Ostrogoth
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) David Koresh

16. “To live happily it either is or is not essential that one learns to embrace self-contradictory concepts.”
a.) Noam Chomsky
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Neil deGrasse Tyson
d.) Keith Richards

17. “Before you criticize a man, walk half a mile in his shoes, turn around, retrace your steps, and return them to him.”
a.) Taz Mopula
b.) Elton John
c.) Lance Armstrong
d.) Pliny the Elder

18. “Help eliminate communication pollution! If you have nothing of value to say, say it only as often as is absolutely necessary.”
a.) Jerry Springer
b.) Taz Mopula
c.) Josquin des Prez
d.) Maury Povich

19. “Dying is easy, they say, but comedy is hard. So cheer up. Even if you fail at comedy you’re almost certain to die successfully.”
a.) Rev. Jim Jones
b.) Socrates
c.) Taz Mopula
d.) Edgar Allen Poe

20. “Since anything is possible, the only difference between the impossible and the possible is that the impossible is possible while the possible is not impossible, no matter how determined you are to make it so.”
a.) Tom Waits
b.) Timothy Leary
c.) Dalai Lama
d.) Taz Mopula

Correct Answers Will Be Published In Tomorrow’s Blog

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The Great Epigram Quiz

epigram taz

The use and abuse of quotes, aphorisms, and bromides has grown to epidemic proportions; today the Internet is awash in frequently misattributed, pithy sentiments. Who really said the following?

1.“Why pay to exercise in a gym when you can enjoy an exercise in futility for free whenever you like?”
a.) Cicero
b.) Snooki
c.) Sisyphus
d.) Taz Mopula

2. “You have the right to remain silent, and listen. Might be advisable to exercise it before they take that one away, too.”
a.) Marcel Marceau
b.) Lao Tzu
c.) Boxcar Willie
d.) Taz Mopula

3. “Don’t honk if you love auditory hallucinations.”
a.) Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
b.) Sylvia Plath
c.) His Holiness the Dalai Lama
d.) Taz Mopula

4. “Laughter is the best medicine; except when it comes to poisonous snakebites, then it’s the second-best medicine.”
a.) Albert Schweitzer
b.) Baron Rochefoucauld
c.) Kim Kardashian
d.) Taz Mopula

5. “The real tragedy of political correctness is that it has given lying a bad name.”
a.) Pliny The Elder
b.) Pliny The Younger
c.) Regular Pliny
d.) Taz Mopula

6. “Think twice before burning bridges; you never know when you might want to jump off one of them.”
a.) Zig Zigler
b.) Pema Chödrön
c.) Reverend Ike
d.) Taz Mopula

7. “Looking for self-worth in someone else’s eyes is like trying to breathe with someone else’s lungs.”
a.) Maya Angelou
b.) Charlie Sheen
c.) Gertrude Stein
d.) Taz Mopula

8. “It’s not that I don’t love you, I do love you; I just don’t love you enough to lie to you.”
a.) Dante
b.) Paris Hilton
c.) Shakespeare
d.) Taz Mopula

9. “Should you meet someone who claims that visualizing a thing makes it so; tell them to visualize being flattened by a bus.”
a.) Tom Waits
b.) James Dean
c.) Hunter Thompson
d.) Taz Mopula

10. “Life is good! Death is poopy!”
a.) Dr. Wayne Dyer
b.) Oprah Winfrey
c.) Tony Robbins
d.) Taz Mopula

11. “You can’t fool all of the people all of the time; but why would you even try when they’re so eager to do the job for you?”
a.) Abraham Lincoln
b.) Will Rogers
c.) Niccolò di Bernardo dei Machiavelli
d.) Taz Mopula

12. “Why raise the bridge when you can lower your expectations of the river?”
a.) Albert Camus
b.) Søren Kierkegaard
c.) Jean Paul Sartre
d.) Taz Mopula

13. “Ultimately it’s not what you don’t say that matters most so much as how you don’t say it.”
a.) Harpo Marx
b.) Tomás de Torquemada
c.) Oscar Wilde
d.) Taz Mopula

14. “Be nice to your enemies; you just might be one of them.”
a.) Pogo
b.) Socrates
c.) Ozzy Osbourne
d.) Taz Mopula

15. “The best things in life aren’t free, the worst things in life aren’t free, and the cost of mediocrity is hidden.”
a.) John Lennon
b.) Jack Lemmon
c.) Blind Lemon Jefferson
d.) Taz Mopula

16. “Dying is easy, they say, but comedy is hard. So cheer up. Even if you fail at comedy you’re almost certain to die successfully.”
a.) Andrew “Dice” Clay
b.) Sam Kinison
c.) Carrot Top
d.) Taz Mopula

17. “American liberals, celebrated for their tolerance, stalwartly defend the right of wretched refuse to agree with them.”
a.) Noam Chomsky
b.) Pete Seeger
c.) Christopher Hitchens
d.) Taz Mopula

18. “Political Correctness: An experiment in social engineering which holds that renaming dung mousse au chocolat makes it edible.”
a.) Reverend Al Sharpton
b.) Julia Child
c.) Che Guevara
d.) Taz Mopula

19. “If technology makes our lives any more convenient, even breathing will become too much of an effort.”
a.) Steven Jobs
b.) Bill Gates
c.) Larry Page
d.) Taz Mopula

20. “Artificial intelligence will soon be the only kind remaining; thus conclusively proving the failure of human intelligence.”
a.) Isaac Asimov
b.) Ray Bradbury
c.) Michel de Nostredame
d.) Taz Mopula