One-Sentence Stories

Despite a manly thrashing from Ernest Hemingway, meted out with pugilistic zeal, the mime refused to speak. Garrison Keillor inhaled deeply during a monologue; passed out, and awoke hours later in a pool of his own gravitas. Charles Bukowski stared at the woozy red label and understood at last that Blatz Beer was both a […]

There Is No Need To Reinvent The Lemur

I have been a promotion writer for 30+ years. Essentially, promotion writing involves making true statements in a way that encourages readers to arrive at false conclusions. For example, when I say that our vinyl siding virtually never needs painting I’m actually saying our siding needs painting. “Ultimately it’s not what you don’t say that […]

Let’s Eliminate Wretched Writing

I’ve been a professional writer for 30 years and in that time I’ve learned a few things. So, with the help of with my old friend Taz, I’m going to toss out some pointers guaranteed to make you a better writer. “Technology has democratized the tools of creativity, resulting in a tsunami even more cretinous […]

I Know Why The Alligator Hides

I began writing INVISIBLE DRIVING in 1990 and ultimately self-published it in 2007 – that was 4 literary agents and 100s of rejection slips ago. I learned that there is something harder than surviving Manic Depression, harder even than writing a book about it – that is publishing a book about it. The torrent of abuse and […]